Jack Feister, age 7, Unemployed

"It’s not an allergy attack, it’s more like an allergy invasion."

tomfeister — Thu, 28 Mar 2013 08:08:06 -0400

““It’s not an allergy attack, it’s more like an allergy invasion.””

- Jack Feister, age 9, unemployed

"I’m a candy eating machine! What did you expect me to do?"

tomfeister — Wed, 27 Mar 2013 10:00:47 -0400

““I’m a candy eating machine! What did you expect me to do?””

- Jack Feister, age 9, unemployed.

"This movie is so funny it’s literally making me fart!"

tomfeister — Tue, 26 Mar 2013 10:00:54 -0400

““This movie is so funny it’s literally making me fart!””

- Jack Feister, age 9, unemployed

"I think it would be weird if Mom ate you."

tomfeister — Mon, 25 Mar 2013 10:00:34 -0400

““I think it would be weird if Mom ate you.””

- Jack Feister, age 9, unemployed

"Grandma, do people sell Plutonium?"

tomfeister — Sun, 24 Mar 2013 18:31:22 -0400

““Grandma, do people sell Plutonium?””

- Jack Feister, age 9, unemployed

"Oh yeah? Well tell it to my dead lawyer!"

tomfeister — Sun, 24 Mar 2013 10:00:47 -0400

““Oh yeah? Well tell it to my dead lawyer!””

- Jack Feister, age 9, unemployed, overheard from his toy room.

"My butt says “Good morning."

tomfeister — Sat, 23 Mar 2013 22:43:57 -0400

““My butt says “Good morning.””

- Jack Feister, age 9, unemployed, shortly after he loudly broke wind while eating breakfast

Ultron

tomfeister — Fri, 08 Mar 2013 20:26:05 -0500

Ultron

Ultron by Jack Feister, age 9. Not for sale.

tomfeister — Wed, 06 Mar 2013 21:45:45 -0500

Ultron by Jack Feister, age 9. Not for sale.

If you could pick one gift to receive from Santa, what would it be and why?

Wed, 06 Mar 2013 21:44:24 -0500

It would be a magic sword because I just thought it would be cool to have a magic sword.

"‎”If I knew I’d get this much attention dressed as a Ninja Turtle I’d do it every..."

tomfeister — Wed, 31 Oct 2012 21:38:56 -0400

“‎”If I knew I’d get this much attention dressed as a Ninja Turtle I’d do it every day!!””

- Jack Feister, age 8, unemployed

"‎”Daddy! Come look at this rock!! It’s got spit all over it!!"

tomfeister — Wed, 24 Oct 2012 14:49:53 -0400

“‎”Daddy! Come look at this rock!! It’s got spit all over it!!””

- Jack Feister, age 8, unemployed

"Boy, the morning sure comes early some days."

tomfeister — Fri, 05 Oct 2012 08:33:44 -0400

““Boy, the morning sure comes early some days.””

- Jack Feister, age 8, unemployed

How old is Godzilla and is he potty trained?

tomfeister — Mon, 01 Oct 2012 07:16:03 -0400

Well if he started out in 1954 and it’s 2012, then that makes him 58.

Godzilla is not potty trained because he doesn’t pee, and he doesn’t poop either, but he doers burp. He doesn’t really fart either. If he did then he would be a Space Godzilla.

Jack, I'm considering spending all my money — but I'm not sure if I should buy a helicopter or a monster truck. Both, of course, would have machine guns. Can you help?

tomfeister — Sun, 30 Sep 2012 14:33:33 -0400

How about a Monster helicopter with a self-destruct button in case you’re stupid.

If the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles fought the Decepticons, who would win?

tomfeister — Sun, 30 Sep 2012 14:26:25 -0400

The Ninja Turtles. Because ninjas are awesome they would use ”Hot Nunchuck Fury” ”Stabbing Swords” and “Annoying Sais” and stone head like Mikey’s in their butts. The Decepticon’s butts.

Hello Jack-If you could be any animal, which one would you be and why?

tomfeister — Sun, 30 Sep 2012 10:23:06 -0400

Does a dinosaur count? A Megalodon because it’s the most fierce animal ever. It can bite the head off a whale, and its real. Heard about Shark Week?

"“With which Ninja Turtle would he most like to be stranded on a desert..."

tomfeister — Sun, 30 Sep 2012 10:18:52 -0400

“

“With which Ninja Turtle would he most like to be stranded on a desert island?”

Leonardo, because he is a good leader and he has two swords, because having two swords is better than one.

”

Jack, do you think that Godzilla destroying Tokyo had anything to do with the start of the Zombie Apocalypse?

tomfeister — Sun, 30 Sep 2012 10:09:00 -0400

Yes, Because radiation sent them to their deaths and if there’s enough radiation in Godzilla some of the radiation will give off and turn people into zombies.

Radiation is like a drug and it will make you more dead than alive. The possibilities that if radiation can make a 30 story monster alive it can make a bunch of zombies a giant zombie.

That is all.

"Soundwave is silent but deadly. He’s like a robot fart."

tomfeister — Sun, 16 Sep 2012 05:55:05 -0400

““Soundwave is silent but deadly. He’s like a robot fart.””

- Jack Feister, age 8, explaining Transformers Prime to his sister